Silk

I have grown accustomed it. 

the sumptuousness of this silk 

 Each intricately strewn thread vibrating on the plains of consciousness

each weave, heavy with pain.


I have made my peace with it. Somehow.

The euphoria stealing its way to my life,

closing its hands upon my heart..

Numbing all else

electrifying the dead thing i insist on having.


I  feel the cleansing each tear bring;

underneath the cover of this sumptuousness

 this transformative call,

this reciprocity of life residing in death.


So now i wait,

watching, 

breathing

feeling,

as my wings spout forth from this cleansing

making me whole

(Ak.17)

 

In the midst of wolves my heart sought solace

home washed over me, held me captive in this sweet embrace.


Peace followed this untamed wildness

as we serenaded eachother with sickly tales…

delighting in wounded carcasses 

prowling for it in the midst of the nebulous night.


Till the thirst filled their throats,

choking their nostrils,

till they bayed for it 

clawing at my back…deeper and deeper

till my heart beats no more, finding its dark solace in this place

(A.k17)

 

Her

She was my first love. 

My place of freedom from whence life beckoned me.

Her arms, the anchor i clung to through my dark birth held me close.


Her kiss…

her chapped uncertain kiss

bore the honey dipped ointment to my scared cries… 


Her presence, sturdy as the oak

was my safety,

the calm that carries me in my darkest moments.


Her Love,

Dirty, raw, uncut like the rarest diamonds,

takes my breath away. 

She is my brilliance

Ak17

Freedom

She wore her weakness like a badge of honor
Sporting the finery that each weakened moment

had etched about her.

Beautifully broken lines
Woven intricately into the fabric of her body,
She had no need for gold and diamonds
For she found it within herself,
Smelting her circumstances
Sharpening her existence
to become her own hero,
Digging though the mud to find her nirvana.
Her weakness, her pride,

her Freedom.

(A.k17)

P.E.R.K U.P

 

Today was a bastard.

The curveballs thrown my way seemed to be leaden with spikes, dipped in volcano vomit. It was gross and I am now locking myself in my room willing it to be tomorrow already.

I woke up like Beyonce, all prayed up and Boss status like the Child of God I am, but damn the minute my feet hit my less than stellar carpet, the devil and his minions, decided to play tag with my emotions.

Asshole.

So I did the logical thing. Tossed my to-do list aside (cos I was crippled by this time), turned the music up, and proceeded to dance in my sweat drenched sports bra and towel. I danced all the damn emotions to the side, I danced mindlessly, letting the music fill my lungs as it coursed through my body. I submitted to my mindlessness and how blissful it was to not be at the whim of the day. When I finished with my mini-show, i somehow was strengthened to take on the rest of the asshole day…  I was more productive after this mini dance mania than in moments when I allowed my fears and emotions rule my day.

Some days are like this, unfolding uncharacteristically with aplomb like an orchestra out of sync, rushing into your being like a ton of bricks. It Is adamant in crippling you and rendering you useless, with attempts to convince you that you are failing and will continue to fail. NO you are not. So go ahead and give days like that the finger. Play your music loud and proud dance (naked or clothed) like no one is watching (except well, if you have neighbors) even if it is for 5 mins..no make it 10mins. Bask in it, truly bask in it like the hippies did. If it isn’t music, then paint, or cook or sculpt or read, or lie down and stare at the ceiling. Take a moment to just.fucking.live

 

Now to end this shit day i shall proceed to wiggle my bottom to this gem

Ak17