On this bed…..
i have tasted those lips,
sealed our fortunes with a thousand kisses.
I traced your very lifeline with my tongue,
etched my name on your being,
now you wear my imprint on your soul
Adorned to the heavens with my wiles
On this bed…
I have choked on your distance
cowered from your heated malice…
i have bitten down on this tongue that once pleasured you…
On this bed.
i watch your strangeness make a home
On this bed.
I will make of these weary bones,
creaking and fragile to the touch,
sweet melodies from beyond Valhalla.
Music of life shall i make from the embers of Death;
conjuring sweet poetry from these ashes
to sate you.
From these cinders,
will your soul will get its fill.
within these embers,
ambrosia shall burst forth.
At the deafening sounds of doubts,
I beat my chest,
rousing this feeble heart…
speaking Life into it
in hopes that i do not drown in my fallibility
I tell it lovingly,
You have been validated,
with a thousand galaxies,
exploding, imploding within
Birthing new life with each breath
bringing you to this space of beatified worth.
You ripped through space and time
breaking nothingness to bring your very essence to life
why shrivel from the forces that spew fire at you?
Do you not know you are light personified?
I come from a tribe of sex-less women
women who drown in the pools of birth and piety to keep a man
Women who balk at the call of their innate need…
need to feed the goddess that reside within them
I come from this place
where self-indulgence spells harlot
where fucking mocks piety
The piety of bearing a seed in this sin
I come from this place
where pleasure demands immediate cleansing,
to wash this scent of life itself, clean
I exist in this place where my desires reflection stands like a stranger
An affront to my eyes
Today was a bastard.
The curveballs thrown my way seemed to be leaden with spikes, dipped in volcano vomit. It was gross and I am now locking myself in my room willing it to be tomorrow already.
I woke up like Beyonce, all prayed up and Boss status like the Child of God I am, but damn the minute my feet hit my less than stellar carpet, the devil and his minions, decided to play tag with my emotions.
So I did the logical thing. Tossed my to-do list aside (cos I was crippled by this time), turned the music up, and proceeded to dance in my sweat drenched sports bra and towel. I danced all the damn emotions to the side, I danced mindlessly, letting the music fill my lungs as it coursed through my body. I submitted to my mindlessness and how blissful it was to not be at the whim of the day. When I finished with my mini-show, i somehow was strengthened to take on the rest of the asshole day… I was more productive after this mini dance mania than in moments when I allowed my fears and emotions rule my day.
Some days are like this, unfolding uncharacteristically with aplomb like an orchestra out of sync, rushing into your being like a ton of bricks. It Is adamant in crippling you and rendering you useless, with attempts to convince you that you are failing and will continue to fail. NO you are not. So go ahead and give days like that the finger. Play your music loud and proud dance (naked or clothed) like no one is watching (except well, if you have neighbors) even if it is for 5 mins..no make it 10mins. Bask in it, truly bask in it like the hippies did. If it isn’t music, then paint, or cook or sculpt or read, or lie down and stare at the ceiling. Take a moment to just.fucking.live
Now to end this shit day i shall proceed to wiggle my bottom to this gem
GIVE ME BACK MY LIFE!
Give to me the passion that unfurled within and burned the ground in its wake
the tears that broke many a heart…
Give me the years of hope laden breaths,
the odes and prayers that escaped my lips,
whipping my spirit into shape.
Cloak me with my pride,
that i may be armed against the tyrant lips of the outside.
Give the love that was once mine;
a brief moment, lost in time..
Give me court to glimpse his eyes to satiate my soul
to drown in that soul that so engulfed me.
Give me my life
for i do not recognize the footprints that follow my shadow
Here i lay with my home;
watching the dawn kiss the earth, ‘rousing it from slumber.
playing the fool…waiting
for the night to fall that i may lay;
with this darkness,
this place i call home
allowing our sins spill over into the silent hours of dawn